Things I Learned This Weekend

1) The BYU Ballroom Dance Team is phenomenal. There's a reason they have been undefeated national champions since 1982.


2) Girls in their 30's who look like they are 20 should not sit alone in Sacrament Meeting in a new ward right in front of "Priest Row" at the back of the chapel. They will be a distraction from the worship service for these good young men. If they only knew how old I was, I'm guessing they would not be quite so interested in my black boots.


3) Two year-olds are the best people to talk to on the phone. On Sunday, my conversation with my nephew Bryce started like this, "Hi Traci. I'm naked." Where do you go from there?

Thoughts on Pages

You know those moments when you're having a conversation with someone and what you hear yourself saying and what you really want to be saying are two totally different things? I had one of those today.

Speaker #1 (Not Me): You and I are just on different pages.

Speaker #2 (Me): I know.

In a perfect world, where things come out exactly the way you want them to and you don't have to worry about other people's feelings and things, I would have said, "Ok. But I have a degree in English and a Masters in reading and literacy. I am practically an EXPERT in pages. I am on the right page! You are on the wrong page! I am right. You are wrong. Stop being an idiot. Turn the freaking page and get on with it."

Thank you for listening to my self-absorbed rant. You may now return to your regularly scheduled programming.

Happy Neil Diamond Day!

Happy Birthday to Neil Diamond! It's the big 7-0 for Neil today.

They grow up so fast.

And The Neil Diamond Birthday Club could not be more proud! Long Live Brother Neil!

I'm Such a Girl

Last night around eight o'clock, I realized I had absolutely nothing to wear to work today. Not only that, there was nothing I owned that I could possibly wear outside of my apartment ever again. I was going to have to "call in ugly" to work today. And every day until I lost my job, which would inevitably lead to a downward cycle of despair. I would withdraw from society and eat nothing but cold cereal and Oreos, doomed to live out the rest of my days in ugly-bitter loneliness. And I was certain, in the end, I was going to be eaten by wolves.

After an undetermined amount of time, I was able to dry my tears, pull myself off the heap of ill-fitting sweaters and pants on my bedroom floor, gather what precious little was left of my courage... and make a desperate trip to Kohls.

Pair of cords from the clearance rack: $10.80
Turquoise vest (also on clearance): $13.20

Not being eaten by wolves: Priceless

Corduroy Cutie Pie

A picture is worth 1,000 words on this one. What a cutie!!!

Baby's First Christmas

Brace yourself for the cuteness that was Lauren at Christmas Time. Are you ready for this?

Tilt and Smile

I had to get my picture taken today to complete my passport application. The photographer/postal employee had a hard time getting me positioned just right. He kept wanting me to look straight at the camera. Anyone who has ever seen a picture of me will know that this is not physically possible for me. If I'm posing for a picture, I simply must tilt my head to a really weird angle before I can smile. My brothers and sister have teased me for years about this phenomenon. They call it The Classic or The Tilt and Smile. But I can't help it. I really can't.

I did try my very, very best today. I'll be interested to get my passport to see how the picture turned out!